SEEKING TO TELL THE GOOD NEWS TO THOSE LOST...

I am 20 years old.  I live in the Dallas area.  I was raised in church, but after I graduated high school, I got in a relationship that changed my life forever.  It was just fine at the beginning, but this guy was "the devil in disguise."  He got me involved with drugs, and, before I knew it, I was in the midst of gangs and he became a drug dealer, a pimp, and a hitman.  I helped transport drugs (but I never became a prostitute for him). 

Most of the stuff that was going on was hidden from me for a long time.  We had very little money, despite all of his endeavors, and I found that he was doing a lot of drugs, namely crack.  He lied all of the time about it.  I really got myself into a bad situation, but by the time all of this was happening, I was in love.  He claimed to love me more than anything.  All this time, we had stopped attending church and God had become foreign to me. 

I was horribly depressed.  So much so, that I did not eat much because I was so upset all of the time that it hurt my stomach to eat.  Not to mention that I made sure that he ate before I did.  I became co-dependent on him.  I lost over 30 pounds during all of this, and even began doing drugs to keep out the pain.  Every time I was convinced that I needed to leave, he emotionally begged me not to.  So I stayed. 

He had an excuse for everything, could explain everything away.  He was totally overprotective and he began to get violent with me.  I was emotionally and physically abused for awhile.  I lost everything, and just when I probably was about to die and give it all up, my family intervened. 

They [clandestinely  removed] one of my hairs from a hairbrush and had it tested for drugs.  It, of course, was positive, so they were able to send me to an emotional/drug rehab. I had not yet become addicted to drugs, but I was addicted to my boyfriend.  I lived for the good times, and all the times in between were pure hell.   He was slowly killing me.  I spent a month there.

A man spoke to me and I realized I was afraid to go back to God after all that I had done, but he told me that He still loved me, no matter what, and there was nothing I could ever do, nothing ever bad enough, that would change that, and He would be overjoyed to have me back.  So I worked my way back, started praying again, and went from absolutely nothing to being really blessed. 

I got a full scholarship to go back to school, and I have a really good job working for a large law firm in downtown Dallas.  I have things again. I have life again.  I want others to know that God will take them in, too, no matter what they've done, and they will be able to see the difference God can make in their lives. 

I never appreciated God and His blessings half as much as I do now. 

Sincerely, Jessica

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